


waters edge

by panhom



Category: Left 4 Dead (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aquaphobia, Canon-Typical Violence, Completed, Drowning, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, It's Soft, Male Friendship, Male-Female Friendship, Near Death, Near Death Experiences, Panic Attacks, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, SO MUCH FLUFF, Whumptober 2020, but it's posted in november sorry i forgot, dude there is so much fluff, feel good fic with some angst, have i made it apparent that they are all friends who love each other yet, it's wholesome in a really traumatizing way, like tons, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27622579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/panhom/pseuds/panhom
Summary: Nick never cared for the ocean, or any body of water for that matter. (Whump-fic, lot's of angst but LOTS of fluff.)
Relationships: Coach & Nick (Left 4 Dead), Ellis & Nick (Left 4 Dead), Nick/Rochelle (Left 4 Dead), lol - Relationship, nick n nick
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	waters edge

**Author's Note:**

> Not entirely sure if this is canon-compliant, but I mean, whumptober! Except it's posted in November because I forgot. I don't think it's OOC for Nick to cry either. He's tough, but he's also overly emotional when it comes to getting angry, and I think a panic attack from a traumatic near death experience or reminder of one would be enough to push him over the edge. it may be a bit gratuitous in angst or things that happen, but hey! it's all for the fluff man. Enjoy! (also i don't know how cruise ships work i'm poor. so if this is somehow wrong, forgive me and my 99%-ness. lol) also i refuse to write accents. i'm not southern. i can't write ellis voice other than yeehaw and gosh darn it. : (
> 
> (this is for iggy, a good friend of mine who just got into the game and we fight over who gets to be Nick. I win the rock paper scissors all the time so I wrote this as an "apology" since she she wanted it LOL ily <3)

Nick never cared for the ocean, or any body of water for that matter.  
  
Of course, Nick got into this mess after he had taken a cruise down Georgia, but he was desperate for any kind of gamble he felt he could win at the moment. He remembered his ex-wife once wanted to visit the Bahama's, or Hawaii, or Jamaica, or any popular rich white people resort that she could think of. Nick vehemently told her "No" (Granted, with a lot more profanity) and even offered to send her out alone if it would get her to shut up about it. Their marriage lasted 2 months, and Nick almost forgot why they married in the first place. Of course, that's a story for another time. And if anyone knows Nick, they know his distaste for any stories.  
  
"And this one time, my buddy Keith and I drove a boat out into a corn field; Did NOT end well."  
  
Speaking of stories.  
  
"I'm amazed you said that grammatically correct," Nick snorted, as they waded through a swamp. "I would almost be convinced you weren't a hick if not for your grating accent."  
  
"Nick, zip it." Rochelle ordered, reloading her pistol. "Continue, Ellis, I think we can listen to one more story before we're done for the night. The sun is setting."  
  
Coach nodded in agreeance, though he wasn't particularly fond of Ellis' long winded stories either, but he wasn't as hostile as Nick was. Ellis needed an outlet, and if this helped the boy keep his spirits up, so be it; Even at the expense of Nick's. Nick didn't retort; He was too focused on the safehouse that they knew was nearby. They noticed the door from a roof they had been on from a mile away, escaping another horde after setting off a car alarm. (Not naming any names. Ellis.) Nick was typically quiet about his fears, however; He didn't mind complaining, obviously, but showing any sort of weakness wasn't in his agenda. Getting on a boat in the past was enough for him to become dizzy with anxiety, but being in an apocalypse where you could be at deaths doorstep any second, he could put that fear away for a little while. The sewer was gross, but he could tell it was deep enough for him to walk in, quelling his fears for a little bit. But not for what was about to happen next, no way.  
  
"We're going to have to get on this boat." Coach said as they approached a dock; The town ended before a long stretch of lake, which lead to the next town over. There was a small, busted up dingy that looked to barely float, but it could make it across the mile of water with little to no issue if they didn't rock it.  
  
"Are you sure, Coach? Can it handle your weight? Maybe you should walk to the other side and come back, you'd have lost some weight then." Nick sneered, "But then again, you'd already be over there then, implying you'd make it that far." Coach glared at Nick's comment, used to them but not in the mood for his jokingly-yet-hurtful words as they had just almost died from a horde not 30 minutes prior. "Nick, could you keep your mouth shut for one second?" Rochelle swatted his shoulder, not too hard but not light enough for it to be considered playful. "We're all exhausted, and don't need your bitching. Could you stay quiet till we get to the safehouse, at least?"  
  
"Sorry, princess. Didn't know it was that time of the month for you, I'll be sure to be more brain-dead and positive like this moron over here." He gestured to Ellis, and Ellis couldn't help but laugh under his breath. "Maybe to you Nick, but considering the way you act, it could be that time of the month for you too! Though it's hard to tell, it might be that time for you all the time! Be careful not to stain the white suit any more than it is already. I wonder if that blood is REALLY from a zombie!" Ellis followed Rochelle and Coach into the dingy, laughing heartily at Nick's red face.  
  
"You fu-, You fucking-" "  
  
Sorry, princess!" Coach laughed, causing the group the laugh even harder. Nick growled and turned away from the group. "I'll go around then, the swamp is still connected the town. If you're all so keen on me not speaking till we get there, I can go by myself." Coach rolled his eyes, grabbing the rowing paddles from the floor of the boat. "Sure you are, you'll definitely survive that hoard that's definitely lurking in those forests. It's denser in there than it is in the swamp we passed through. Get on the boat Nick." "  
  
"Not fond of water, I can survive a miles trek alone. I don't need you morons to protect me." Nick growled, and Ellis leaned forward and tugged Nick's suit jacket, and the older man swatted his hand.  
  
"Really? Because back at the rooftop when you got bile on you, and freaked out and nearly fell-"  
  
"WE DON'T NEED TO TALK ABOUT THE ROOFTOP."  
  
"Zip it you two!" Coach demanded.  
  
"Kid, if you don't get your sorry ass on this sorry ass boat, I will personally use you as a rowing paddle across the river."  
  
"Well you yourself said it was a sorry ass boat, so I think you should agree that we should walk instea-"  
  
Ellis pulled Nick down, and the older man fell into the deeper-than-he-thought water with a splash. He let out a gasp as he grabbed onto the boat for what he felt was dear life, as Coach hauled him onto the boat, all of them still laughing, unaware of the effect it had on Nick, but not for long.. The next thing they knew, Nick had decked Ellis in the face. Not with all his strength, but definitely enough to leave a bruise. "Nick, what the hell?!" Coach held Nick back from swinging again, as Rochelle yelled at him and grabbed Ellis, making sure he didn't fall into the water as well. Coach pulled backwards, nearly falling out himself as Nick struggled against the older, larger man, looking like a child throwing a tantrum and an exhausted parent trying to calm them down.  
  
"Oh!? And It's fine for him to do that to me? If you EVER push me into water again, I will pull out your eyelids and gamble them for the corpse of your infant, inbred daughter!"  
  
This was a little bit more volatile than they had expected, even from Nick. He was clearly on the verge of a panic attack, seeing his wild movements, panicked eyes, and tears brimming as he screeched profanities. Ellis looked mortified, clearly disturbed at the disturbance he had experienced from Nick and had caused to him. They all realized that Nick, in fact, did not like water. You could almost say he was terrified of it. (Sarcasm intended.)  
  
"Alright kid, we get it, you can calm down now." He grabbed Nick's flailing arms and pulled them against his body, wrapping him in a bear hug. He wasn't sure if this was the correct call for someone like Nick having a panic attack, but he felt it was better than letting him go all out on the youngest member. Nick eventually calmed as Coach continued to tell him to do so. "It's okay now, you're fine, you aren't going to fall, if you did, I'd get you out." As Nick became calmer and looked more tired, which thankfully didn't take more than a minute or two, Coach set him down on the opposite side of the boat of Ellis, handing Rochelle the paddle.  
  
"You two row, I'll keep him calm."  
  
"I don't need YOU to keep me calm."  
  
Coach patted Nick's shoulder, the younger visibly embarrassed by his panicked outburst, pulling his leg across his knee, and leaning his elbow on it and put his chin in his hand, looking away from the rest of the group. He focused his eyes on the bottom of the boat, however, avoiding the water as the boat rocked slightly.  
  
"Sure you don't. Don't worry, it won't be long till we make it to shore."  
  
Thankfully, any zombie nearby hadn't heard the commotion, considering the denser part of the swamp was farther away than they thought, and they had killed every zombie they came across in the town. Nick wiped his face with hand, wiping away any evidence of tears. Coach kept his hand on Nick's shoulder, comforting but firmly planted. The conman turned his eyes to Ellis and glared angrily, and Ellis chose to keep his eyes straight ahead towards the town as they rowed. Rochelle hadn't said a word, still in shock at what happened. It was far more shocking to see Nick become so emotional in a way that wasn't pure anger, but then she reminded herself that Nick was human too, and that he felt and had fears as the rest of them did. Still, it was odd to her to think that he could become THAT undone by a little water. But she didn't know his past, none of them did. And he preferred to keep it that way. They rowed for another ten minutes before making it to land. Nick was still drenched, and none of them had said a word the rest of the way there, other than Nick's shivers and groans, and Coach's occasional "You're okay" in response to them. Coach was the first out of the boat, stepping around Nick to test the sturdiness of the dock. Once he cleared it, Rochelle and Ellis stepped around Nick as well, Ellis making sure to step over him as high as he could to avoid being tripped, But Nick made no attempt to move.  
  
"Come on Nick, it's safe to get out." Nick hadn't changed his position the entire way, probably sore from the sitting position, but he was obviously too frozen with fear to move. This man definitely did not care for deep water. Coach sighed tiredly, but sympathetic as well when Nick didn't say anything. Rochelle and Ellis threw the paddles to the side as Coach bent and grabbed Nick under his arms and pulled him out of the boat. As he dragged Nick out, Nick's leg slammed back on the seat of the dingy, causing it to pull up and allow water to sink the boat. Nick scrambled away as he felt water touch his ankle. Usually he wouldn't care that much, but this was a situation he didn't care for or was used to. Ellis and Rochelle rushed over, pulling Nick with Coach to safety, though it was obvious Coach could handle it, but they couldn't help themselves. Nick stumbled back as they dragged him to land, then pushed them away as they let go of him. His breathing was heavy and eyes moved back towards the sinking boat.  
  
"Nick-"  
  
"Be quiet."  
  
" _Nick-"_

_"BE QUIET."_

The older man screamed at Rochelle's calls as he swatted her hand away. "Let's just get to the damned safe room, I'm sick and tired of this shit." He said, quickly trotting up the hill towards the town. The other three knew he didn't want to talk about it, but couldn't help but feel concerned as they followed him. Before they could continue, however, a low-pitched scream erupted from the town, and crows flew through the air.  
  
Ah, yes. A tank. How lovely.  
  
"Oh shit-" Ellis screamed as they all took out there guns, shooting the tank and the oncoming horde that had definitely been alerted by Nick's yelling. Rochelle took out some boomer bile and tossed it at the oncoming tank, and the horde turned their attention towards the tank. "Score!" Rochelle yelled happily, seeing the tank become the main target for the zombies. However, this was short lived as the tank charged towards them.   
  
Then straight towards Nick.  
  
It, along with the horde, grabbed him and took him into the water, then repeatedly slammed him down, in and out of the water. Nick's breath became tainted with water as he tried to breath, but the rapid motion of the insanely strong arm was too much for his lungs. He felt himself become weaker as he heard his comrades scream his name in the distance.  
  
_There he was, a 20 year old newly-made conman, who had just enjoyed a massive win from the casino he was exiting. He had been on a cruise for over a week straight, and they had made a stop that night in California before they would make their way back to Florida. He had a light skip in his step as he exited the casino and made his way back to the ship, keeping an eye out on those around him to avoid getting robbed. He was young and stupid (not that that changed much with age) but he wasn't so stupid to get caught unarmed. As he returned to his bunk in the ship, the morning came when they departed and were about half a mile away from shore._

_Then, there was a loud boom.  
  
Nick scrambled out of bed as he smelled the smoke and heard the explosion. After this catastrophe, he had heard it was due to a gas leak from an ill-prepared engine, and that the cruise ship had been aware of this yet did nothing about it, praying that nothing would happen. Nearly everyone sued them, and all passengers and their family got a hefty consolation for their trauma, but Nick didn't consider it worth it.  
  
He ran out of the room, suitcase filled with cash in tow, hearing panicked passengers make their way to the evacuation rafts. He coughed violently as smoke and fumes poured into his system, and he felt himself bump into someone as he covered his face with his arm.  
  
Ah, the man he had conned in the casino. How lovely.  
  
It was a perfect storm that the man was on the same cruise as him, a perfect storm that they would run into each other. He remembered the staff having to hold the man back from attacking Nick after Nick had won the entire bet, leaving the older man in anguish as Nick sneered and left the building. The man's face went from confusion to pure anger at the sight of the shorter man, and his eyes darted to brief case. He grabbed the handle of it, and Nick pulled back with all his might. The began fighting over the briefcase, and if Nick had been a smarter boy, he would have let go and ran. He was soon overpowered, and the man had grabbed the briefcase and made a run for it. Nick followed after him despite the boat leaning just a bit too far to the left, making his way through passengers who were going the opposite direction of him. He met the man at the edge of the ship that was becoming increasingly closer to the water.   
  
"Hey asshole," Nick yelled, getting closer and closer to the man, who looked like a cornered animal. "Give it back and maybe I won't tear you a new one."  
  
This man, who Nick had never even learned the name of, didn't take his word for it, and threw himself off the ship. Nick's eyes widened in disbelief, as the man dove into the water, and he waited with baited breath till he saw him reappear and start swimming towards shore. This didn't matter though, as the boat finally toppled over, sending Nick and the rest of the passengers into the water. Nick felt himself become pinned under one of the rails that was caught on a particularly high rock. Nick saw many people in the same predicament, his eyes widening in horror as he did everything he could to keep from gasping and losing air. His eyes darted to see if he could get his leg out, but he noticed the man with his briefcase was stuck as well, but had managed to escape. The man had noticed him as well but left him there, understandable yet cruel.  
  
Another explosion, and the top of the ship fell off and plummeted towards the water, striking the man and the briefcase, cutting both in two. This had all happened in mere seconds, and while the the sharp, pointed top of the ship that had been there for décor purposes had sawed the railing in half, allowing pinned passengers to escape, it had also cut a man in two in front of Nick, as he watched his earnings float into the ocean, never to be seen again. Blood filled the water and Nick could see nothing but red, but as he pulled on his leg to escape the railing, he felt it give way and he then swam to the top. He breathed heavily as he was met with fresh air, but the screams of those around him made it far less pleasant than one would think. He saw what looked to be at least 20 bodies floating around him, one even brushing up against him, as it's severed face and burned eyes made contact with his. Nick screamed as he tried to swim away towards the rafts, but his definitely broken leg made that near impossible. His head bobbed in and out of the water, until he felt himself go unconscious. The last thing he saw were the stars in the sky and the mental image of the man being cut in half, the last thing he heard were the cries of those around him, and the last thing he smelled was blood, the last thing he felt was the icy cold water around him.  
  
_

_The next thing he knew, he was in the hospital. A broken leg, hypothermia, several cuts and bruises, but overall okay. He had been saved after he had floated to shore. It was a miracle, and he was in the hospital for a couple of weeks before they let him go, and he had no visitors other than the police who were ready to haul him in for charges of who-wants-to-know. But he managed to escape the night before his release was due, which he also considered a miracle, and continued his conman way of life, but the tragedy still fresh in his mind had left a mental, and some literal, scars on his memory._

And so, he hated water. Deep water, at least, and he hated being pinned in water, he hated being in pain, especially in water. He felt his crowbar he had on his back fall out, and as it floated to the bottom, he grabbed it, swinging it viscously at his attackers, tears pouring from his eyes. The zombies were taken out in masses as Coach pulled out a chainsaw and made his way through, and Ellis and Rochelle shot them off one by one, making sure not to hit Coach or Nick in the process. The tank dropped dead as Nick ended up decapitating it, and as it dropped, it pinned him to the river floor, it's head floating to the bottom beside him. He stared it, taken over by panic, he couldn't move. His eyes met the dead ones of the tank, it's face brutalized from the crowbar. The panic induced deja-vu didn't help as Nick did his best to push off the tank, but he successfully pushed his way out. But, he didn't find any strength left in him, or air, to keep going forward, and he floated slowly to the bottom of the lake. The tightness ins his chest became unbearable, his entire body sore from the brutality of the tank, his eyes began to close. The last thing he saw was his own blood staining the blue water, the last thing he heard was the faint sounds of comrades calling his name, the last thing he smelled was blood and zombie guts, and the last thing he felt was a hand grasp his own, pulling him upwards.

And the first thing he did as the defibrillator shocked him to life was gasp, then groan in pain. He coughed up water was he rolled to his side, grabbing his stomach in pain as he felt blood gush from his wounds.  
  
"Nick!"  
  
He heard his teammates yell his name, and Coach, while just as excited and relieved as the rest, had to hold Ellis back from grabbing Nick in a hug. After they let him recover as much as he could, Coach slowly helped him up, the moved to pick him up as they headed towards the safehouse.

"Damn it, kid, You doing okay?"

They had taken his suit jacket off, and his shirt had been ripped open, showing gashes in his stomach and the scars from previous skirmishes in his life on his chest. He head laid on the older mans shoulder as he continued to cough up little bits of water, and his hand moved over his chest to hide his scars, which he was a bit insecure about.  
  
"Mmm," He murmured against the older man, eyes half closed, floating towards Ellis who was carrying his suit jacket. "Don't... get it..... dirty."  
  
It took them a moment to realize what the half-asleep man was talking about, but then they chuckled softly. "We gotcha, Nick, we won't let Ellis dirty it up." Rochelle smiled, patting Nick's disheveled and wet hair.  
  
"I would never think of it." Ellis said proudly, "I swear on the honor of Jimmy Gibs Jr.!"  
  
They entered the safehouse without another word, the town becoming far more quiet than it had been, seemingly all the zombies taken out. They laid Nick down on a mattress they covered with a blanket.  
  
"Ellis, take off his clothes and give him this." Coach handed him a large shirt he had found in a drawer in a house they hid in a while back. It was significantly cleaner than what you would expect. It definitely hadn't been worn in years. Greasy, but clean enough.  
  
"You... aren't... undressing me." Nick's words slurred, they had given him pain killers once they had gotten inside and found him cognitive enough to take them, so he was pain free enough to complain.

"You _aren't_ going to freeze in that either. Come on, Nick, we won't let Rochelle see your...." Ellis gestured comedically to Nick's dick, and Nick slowly sat up and hurled on Ellis, though it was mostly just water. Ellis screeched, but was quickly shushed by Rochelle. "Now you're BOTH going to have to get naked."  
  
"I do NOT, it was only my shirt! And he did that on purpose!"

Nick smirked as best he could, laying back down with a triumphant smile on his face, but this didn't last long as Coach moved to take off Nick's pants. Nick weakly attempted to kick him away, but Coach held his leg down as he unbuttoned the mans pants.  
  
"Don't kick, this is for your own wellbeing. Rochelle, look away for his sake, take care of Ellis's puke problem."  
  
"It's not _my_ puke problem!" Rochelle ushered him outside, where they took their guns and walked to the river to wash Ellis' shirt. They weren't that far from the safe room if there were another horde or tank, but they were sure that if they stayed quiet, nothing else would attack them. Ellis took off his shirt, waded it in the water a bit, then waded his way out of the water, where Rochelle was waiting for him.  
  
  
"I don't see why Nick has to be so..... _Nick_ , even after everything that happened."  
  
"Well, I think Nick's bitchiness overpowers all else, even near-death experiences and all laws of the universe."  
  
"But he _did_ die Rochelle, you saw it, and, and-"  
  
Ellis rinsed out his shirt in silence, and Rochelle put a hand on his shoulder. "He's alive now, and he feels good enough to be an asshole, he's still the Nick we've grown to care for. I saw the way you dove in after him you know, you got to him before Coach or me could have."  
  
Ellis' eyes avoided hers as they walked back to the saferoom. "He was so cold, and bloody, and his eyes were full of.... terror. Very un-Nick-like. I didn't like it."  
  
"I don't think any of us did, especially Nick."  
  
"Maybe he'll come to appreciate me more after my heroic actions!"  
  
"Oh, Ellis, I think he already does."  
  
  
Nick groaned in embarrassment as he felt his pants slide off, Coach then moving his hands towards the younger mans shirt.  
  
"I can do it myself." Nick's words slurred again, batting the older mans hands away as he attempted to pull his ripped shirt off himself. He found himself too tired to continue, the soreness starting to return as he moved.  
  
"You know," Coach said as he aided Nick in his struggle to undress. "Ellis was the first to dive in after you, and was the one to pull you out too."  
  
Nick's eyes widened a bit as Coach slid his shirt off. He stayed quiet, eyes downcast a bit. Coach ruffled his hair affectionally, and Nick weakly tried to swat it away.  
  
"Don't mess it up."  
  
"I think it's too late for that. Now do you want to take off your underwear so it can dry, or do you want me to?"  
  
Nick's eyes widened in despair, and he attempted to shuffle backwards, but his back met the wall. and Coach, who had been sitting, scooted closer to him as the shorter man backed away. "Leave them on!"  
  
"No, you'll get the mattress more sopping wet than it already is, and you won't feel any better stuck in wet clothes. It's fine, I've seen plenty of them before, and you're too weak to do it yourself, obviously."  
  
"I don't like those implications. You worked at a school."  
  
"Don't take it out of context Nick, gross. I've babysat kids you know."  
  
"There's a difference between grown adults and kids!"  
  
"Not if it's entirely platonic, now stop moving. I need to check you for more wounds too, you're pants were pretty bloody. Maybe it is that time of the month for you."  
  
Nick hissed and whined loudly, almost like a cat, and coughed violently afterwards. "And don't you dare throw up on me." His underwear slid off and his face became red with embarrassment, his hand reaching to cover his crotch. He heard a whistle from the door as it opened, revealing Rochelle hiding her face and Ellis smirking with his catcalling-like whistle.

"Sorry Nick, guess you didn't cover up in time. If you had just let me do it, she'd never had seen! But I mean," Ellis couldn't hold back his laughter as the door shut. "You don't have much reason to hide, I think you're above average!"  
  
Nick's almost lunged at the man, but Coach held him down, the younger man definitely not in his right mind if he was willing to attack the redneck while naked. He grabbed the shirt he had laid out for him and tucked it over the conman's head, taking the mans arms and helping him get them through the holes. Coach grabbed a medpack, and lifted the shirt up to tend to Nick's wounds. Nick kicked the blanket towards him to hide his unmentionables. Rochelle side and walked to the other side of the room to grab some water bottles and Ellis kept laughing.  
  
"HURRY."  
  
"Nick, it's fine, we're all adults here."  
  
"That's apart of the problem."  
  
"I don't like those implications."  
  
"Don't take it out of context, Coach."

Ellis took Nick's clothes and hung them up across the room, and Coach finished patching Nick up, then finally let him put his shirt down. "Take one more pill, Nick." Rochelle said, pulling the blanket over Nick, handing him a painkiller and a waterbottle. Nick didn't feel up to drinking anything, but he did as he was told regardless, feeling himself become more nauseous as he finished. Rochelle fashioned a medpack into a pillow, wrapping it in a blanket and putting it under the injured mans head. "Time for you to sleep. We have plenty of food and supplies, so we'll stay here a few days till you feel good enough to move."  
  
"We need to get to...."  
  
"And we will, but Coach can't carry you all the way there if you end overestimating your ability to walk, sweetheart." A nickname she usually saved for Ellis, she had never used it for Nick unless he had been injured and a bit "out of his mind" which had only happened once or twice before, but never to this degree. He felt the painkillers kick in, the soreness fading to a dull thud. Rochelle pushed him down gently, his hair falling to the side of his face as he closed his eyes.

"We'll be here when you wake up."

And with that, he fell into a deep sleep. Everyone decided to take turns to keep watch, but realized they were all too worried to sleep. Rochelle moved to the upper side of the mattress, and softly stroked the mans hair and face, avoiding the bandages that had been placed there. His soft, steady breathing made the rest feel at ease. He wasn't dead, he was fine, for the most part.

"So, what now?"  
  
Ellis whispered, sitting beside Coach who was at the end of them mattress, looking over Nick as he slept. "No idea." He replied with a sigh. "Nick's too injured to move on for a few days, and I don't think it'd be a good idea to go over any deep water anytime soon. Or Ever."  
  
"I wonder why he's so afraid of water."  
  
"Don't ask, Ellis." Rochelle warned, halting her comforting head strokes for a moment before continuing. "Knowing Nick, his life must have been pretty rough."  
  
"With all his knowledge of brains not coming out of clothing, his ability to break into places with ease, how he said he wasn't allowed to own firearms..." Coach muttered, taking a bite from a can of beans he had grabbed from their rations.  
  
"Questionable, to say the least." Rochelle continued, and Ellis stayed quiet, humming quietly to himself. "Well, I'm glad he's with us. We can take care of him, I doubt he had anyone like that before."

Coach smiled under his breath, and rubbed Nick's leg under the blanket as the younger man squirmed a bit in his sleep, the patted Ellis' shoulder. "I'm glad you were there to save him."  
  
"Shh, he might still be awake!"  
  
"He isn't, he's definitely out of it. And besides, I already told him you were the one who grabbed him out of the water."

"...... How did he react?"  
  
"When he wakes up and is in the mood to speak, why not ask him yourself?"  
  
Coach's words eluded to Nick wanting to actually _listen_ Ellis, so Ellis took that as "pretty un-Nick-like." But at this point, all of them acknowledged that emotions other than anger, though uncommon, were something Nick was capable of. He just had a hard time showing his appreciation, and if he ever wanted to tell them why, they would listen without judgement. Comedic jests here and there, of course, but never judgement.

The next morning, Coach and Rochelle went out to do some food hunting. They had plenty already, but it never hurt to to check. Well, it could, but the lack of zombies in town told them that the population of the town was already pretty small, so they had taken out a significant portion of them already. They were, however, running out of pain pills, and they didn't want to know what Nick was feeling without them, so they were on a journey to look for some as well. Ellis stayed behind, hoping for some alone time with Nick, so he could apologize for his behavior the previous day. Luckily or him, Nick woke up not long after the two left.

"Good morning, sport!" Ellis mimicked Nick's habit of calling him names fit for a child, and Nick groaned in response, pulling the blanket over his head along with his shirt.

"Nick, I can see your ass."

Nick pulled down his shirt and blanket in a huff, still holding it over his head. Ellis chuckled, walking over to the older man and sitting down beside him. All good humor left him once he started speaking. 

"I'm sorry for what I did Nick," he sighed. "I wasn't thinking, I thought you were just overreacting. Like how you do with germs and stuff."  
  
Nick didn't say anything, and Ellis was afraid he had insulted the man. "Well, that's all I wanted to say. Thanks for listenin'." He attempted to stand, but a hand creeped out from the blanket and tugged on his pant leg.

"Thanks." It was muffled, but it was a clear thank you, which was probably the most Nick was willing to muster. "And..... Sorry." Well, Ellis stood corrected. He reminded himself not to underestimate the brunette from then on.

"It's fine, Nick. My pleasure."

Nick muffled an affirmative. Ellis, happy with the answer he got, peaked out from the door to see Rochelle and Coach returning. 

"Did you guys find pain killers?"  
  
Coach shook his head, glancing over to Nick. "We'll try again later, we didn't get to check everywhere. It's just we heard...." His voice became softer as heard Nick stiffen slightly.

"A charger." Rochelle said a bit louder, realizing Nick was scared of more tanks. "Not a tank, thankfully. But still a charger, so we wanted to be more careful. We'll go out later once the rain stops, it's a bit moody out. Your painkillers will last a few more hours, I'm sure." She said to Nick, and he visibly relaxed at the sound of that. They all stayed inside, watching over Nick and conversing about past stories and their lives before the outbreak. When they heard him groan, they realized how fast time had flown. It was almost dusk.

"We'll go out and check one more time." Rochelle told Nick, but he gripped her pant leg as she and Ellis tried to make their way out. "No." He said firmly, not quite awake but in too much pain to sleep.

"But Nick-"

"I can survive one night without painkillers. It's too dangerous."

"The charger isn't going to be out there, we won't be gone long."

She continued to move out the door with Ellis, and Nick groaned loudly. "We'll be back in 30 minutes, promise!" Ellis said joyfully, energetic as always. Coach waved, and sat beside Nick, patting his side. "They'll be fine, Nick. They want you to feel better, and the faster you feel better, the faster we can move." Nick groaned, the pain becoming more and more intolerable, but his fear for his friends becoming his main concern. Coach noticed him gripping his side, and pulled the blanket up to cover his legs, then pulled the shirt up to see the mans bandages.

"I think we should replace your bandages." He said, grabbing a medpack. He undid the mans bandages and replaced them efficiently, the younger man already half asleep by the time he finished. Coach looked at the wounds before he did so, and noticed they were healing slowly but surely. "You're already looking better, so that's good." His eyes moved down to Nick's legs, and Nick curled up into a ball and groaned once more.

"Well, we can save those for tomorrow."

It wasn't long till 30 minutes passed, and Nick was becoming visibly anxious. He sat up, much to Coach's dismay, and stared at the door waiting for his friends to return. "Nick, you have a fever, you're stressed. Lay back down. If they aren't back in 30 minutes, I'll go look for them."  
  
"What... If you don't come back."  
  
Nick was vulnerable for the first time in a long while, and while it was increasingly uncomfortable to be so emotional, he couldn't help it. He was in pain, emotional and physical. Trying to forget the tragic boat wreck as well as his near death experience, Coach also knew that Nick was not, as the kids say, "vibing."

"I will be back, the three of us will make it out alright. But you can't come with me. Now lay down and try to sleep."

Coach knew it was a hopeless endeavor, but attempted to console the panicking man anyway. He gently pushed Nick onto the bed, the injured man whining like an injured puppy. Coach stood, groaning as his knee ached from his sitting position. Nick grabbed the mans pant leg, something he seemed to be doing a lot.

"Nick, please-"

"No."

"I need to go check on them. I can't do that if you're-"  
  
"No."  
  
"Nick-"

"No."

" _Nick-"_

"Fuck you."

_"NICK-"_

"WHOOOOOOO!!!" Ellis burst through the door with an excited jump, Rochelle trudging behind him in a less excited manner, but still visibly happy. "Look what we found!" He showed three adrenaline shots, two medpacks, and two bottles of painkillers. They stopped in their tracks when they saw the tear-stricken face of Nick clutching onto a visibly annoyed and concerned Coach. Nick quickly let go and rolled over, covering his head with his blanket. Coach sighed heavily, and Ellis and Rochelle paled as they realized their mistake.

"We weren't gone longer than 20, were we?" Ellis asked, dreading the answer.

"63, actually." Coach answered, looking at the clock that was somehow still ticking. "Minutes."

They glanced over to Nick, who was embarrassed, obviously, but had probably been concerned out of his mind for them. "Sorry." Ellis and Rochelle said in unison, and Coach took the painkillers from their hands. "It's fine, just close the door behind you."  
  
"Well, we didn't run into many zombies! There are hardly any left around here. We took out the charger though! He was already half dead anyway, so I was like BLAM! WAPOW! He's dead. Gone." Ellis told them energetically, hoping to lighten the mood. "Then we found all this shit! The good shit! The best shit!"

"We get it, Ellis." Rochelle smiled tiredly, "The best shit."  
  
"Yeah, the best shit."

Coach was over at Nick's side, trying to get the man to roll over and take his pills. "Nick, I swear, if you don't take the pills, I'm taking the blanket off." Coach's threat was all Nick needed to roll over, albeit reluctantly. His tired, red eyes were enough to make Coach calm down significantly, and he lifted Nick by his back and handed him a waterbottle for the pills. The young man took them gratefully, though he hated that everyone could see his face now. Coach laid him back down, adjusting the blanket and his makeshift pillow to hopefully be more comfortable.

"There, now you'll feel better. Sleep well." He patted the mans head, who sighed contently. Coach turned to Rochelle and Ellis. "Next time," he said sternly, "keep track of the time. He almost had another panic attack, and I hope I don't need to remind you of the fragile state he's in right now. He may be Nick, but he's still..... _Nick._ " Ellis and Rochelle nodded apologetically, Ellis smiling sheepishly as he did so. "Sorry, just got excited."

"Well, be excited AND keep track of the time."  
  
"Will do, Coach!"

The night went on as it had previously, Nick blacked out and everyone watching over him. But with this emotion filled week, they all became tired and drifted off to sleep, content with Nick's recovery for the time being. But Nick had woken up, and felt mild amounts of pain starting to form in his legs and abdomen. Coach had only given him one pill, and probably forgot to give him more before he went to sleep. He could wake the man, but he already felt guilty for his the actions he had done that day and the previous one, no matter how understandable or right minded he was. He noticed the pills beside his mattress, just barely in his arms reach. He grabbed them and a water bottle, taking what was probably too many, and drank them down with a large gulp. He sighed contently, and as he was about to snuggle back into his pillows, his eyes landed on Coach's. Who was staring at him.

".....Coach?"  
  
"Nick, what did you just do?"  
  
"I took a drink of water."  
  
"What else?"  
  
"Nothing else, Coach. Let me sleep."  
  
Nick, even while sick, tired, injured, and having little energy with a limited vocabulary, could still muster a tone convincing enough to get his lie across. He didn't need Coach whining about his drug habits. He did drugs quite often in his spare time back before the zombie outbreak. Granted, they weren't hard drugs or anything, just marijuana and the like. Nick was what the kids called, "a pussy" and didn't want to ruin his image, so he preferred to stay away from hard drugs as much as he could. But still, what's the harm in taking just a few more?  
  
A lot. There was a lot wrong with it.

At first, Nick slept fine. The pain? Gone! He felt good, but then he started to feel a little too good, then a little too bad. The floaty feeling he felt transformed into nausea, and he could feel his body wanting to expel the drugs he had just taken. Thankfully, Coach had found a trashcan with a sack inside and placed it near the mans bedside, so he was lucky enough not to have to through up on the floor, angering Coach any further than he was about to.

Coach hadn't slept since then, as it had only been around 20 to 30 minutes since his suspicious arose. He trusted Nick to a certain degree, but not enough that he wouldn't expect him to lie straight up about drug abuse when he was obviously in an impaired state at the moment. Especially so, but it had caused Nick to act out of character before, or what seemed to be out of character, so maybe this was one of those rare instances too, but Coach had a sneaking suspicion it wasn't. Which, it wasn't. When he heard Nick violently throwing up, seeing the younger man heaving over the trash can, the large green shirt he was wearing drenched with sweat, Coach knew he had a liar to deal with, a very sick liar.

"Uuuugh."  
  
"Nick?" Rochelle opened her tired eyes, as did Ellis. "What's wrong?" He only answered in "uuuuuuuugh" or in *throwing up noises.* All three took this as a sign of "We're going to have to wait even longer to get out of here, huh?" Oh well, they would decide later. As long as Nick was safe, that's all that mattered, but that didn't change whether or not they were pissed at him. Like right now.

Coach checked the painkiller bottles, which Nick weakly tried to grab from him. "Your grabbing confirms my suspicions." Coach said grimly, peering into the bottle. Yup, more pills missing than usual, and it had been a full bottle previously. "But it never hurts to check, and would you look at that! A significant number of pills gone. So, _Nicholas,_ what do you have to say for yourself?" Nick could only throw up in response, feeling tears on the edges of his eyes. He was already feeling better after throwing up most of what he had that day, but still, he felt awful, especially emotionally. Which he wasn't used to, and definitely did not want to become used to.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Coach asked, storing the pills away.  
  
"Didn't.... want to.....I can do it... myself."  
  
Coach sighed heavily, squeezing the bridge of his nose. "Brat..." Rochelle muttered, holding a wet towel to Nick's forehead. "You obviously can't, champ!" Ellis said, trying to lighten the mood once again, mimicking Nick. Again, Nick could only heave in response, taking off the wet towel on his forehead.  
  
"Put that back on, we need to cool you down. It'll help you feel better and cure that headache you definitely have." Nick shook his head, and when Rochelle tried to make him lie down again to put it back on, he stuck it in her face. "I don't wa...nt to be.... wet." He hated the feeling of sweat that was already on his body, but he could stand that since it was coming from him and not an outside source. Water scary, man.

Rochelle's eyes widened in realization just as she was about to yell at Nick, and looked to Coach for guidance. Coach shrugged, but was visibly concerned. "If his fever doesn't go down, he's gonna have to suck it up. It's his own fault." He ruffled through the pile of blankets they had. "Nick, how are you feeling?"

"Uuuuugh."  
  
"Tell me more than that."  
  
"Cold. Tired. Headache. Stomachache." He didn't feel well enough to make a sassy remark, which only made concern grow amongst the friends. "Wet." Coach sighed for what felt like the fiftieth time that day, but really had only been the second. He replaced the blanket Nick had drenched in sweat, and Nick stole a glance at him, and the older man was definitely not pleased.

"Kid, you do realize you could die from an overdose, right?" Nick didn't answer, looking away, but Coach forcibly made him turn towards him. Nick's eyes widened in surprise at the sudden force, and Rochelle and Ellis stared in surprise at the calm looking yet angry older man. Nick looked away guiltily, but Coach gently but firmly took the smaller mans chin to face his.  
  
"I understand you're tired, sick, scared, and want to do things yourself despite that. News flash: You can't, and you won't. We're here to take care of you, whether you accept it or not. And if you pull that shit again and put yourself in unneeded danger, Nicholas, I swear I will turn you over my knee. You don't have to do this alone, because you aren't alone." Coach threatened. Nick didn't know how to react, his eyes just stared blankly at the older man, then shifted to gauge the reactions of Rochelle and Ellis, who were equally surprised, but then smiled at him in confirmation. They knew that out of everyone, Nick's life must have been the hardest, and they would do their best to alleviate any pain from that from now.

Coach shifted Nicks' gaze back to him as he tapped the younger mans chin. "You got it?" Nick nodded slowly. "I need an verbal agreement, kid, anything will do."

"I.... gotcha." Coach smiled, patted the mans head, and stood, turning towards the other two. "From now one, we sleep in shifts. If Nick needs pills, you get me up, but other than that, you two can handle it.   
  
"Yessiree! You just call on Dr. Ellis and he'll be there for ya!"  
  
"You're not giving him the pills, Ellis. I trust you more than Nick, but after this fiasco, I want to make sure I'm the one keeping him in line."  
  
"I can too! And doctors do other stuff, too! Like take temperatures!"  
  
"Sure, you can stick the thermometer up his ass or something." Rochelle snickered, and Nick pounded his head against the pillow, trying now to listen."  
  
"I don't think that's how you take temperatures, Rochelle, what kind of doctor are you?"  
  
"I'm not a doctor, I just know that's how you take care of _babies_."  
  
Nick felt his strength come back slowly at the mockery he was dealing with. "Not a baby, just want to let that be known."  
  
"Then don't act like it. Communicate instead of whining and going uuuuuuuuuuuuuugh!" Rochelle said, and Ellis and Coach started to laugh. "I'm communicating right now, and I'll communicate that you're an asshole."  
  
"That's where the thermometer is going if you don't watch it!"   
  
"Shut up! Once I'm better I'm gonna knock your lights out, Ellis!"  
  
"What did I do?!"

"Your existence alone is enough to make you punch-worthy."  
  
"i don't think that'd hol' up in court, Nicholas!"  
  
"Don't call me that!"  
  
The two bickered back and forth, and everyone was pleased to see Nick regaining his strength after the tank and pills dilemma. This didn't last long however, as talking really took a number on him, and he eventually just told Ellis to shut up and he rolled back over to go to sleep. They made sure to watch him this time, and when he sat up and attempted to look for pills, Ellis swatted his hand and awoke Coach, who was not pleased to hear about Nick's continued endeavor to treat himself. "Brat." He said, but still treated him nonetheless. Nick still felt quite terrible from the previous incidents, so Coach was wary to give him more than one for fear of overdosing him.

Then the night hit, and Ellis awoke Rochelle and Coach by shaking them, but they were already awakening by the sound of Nick's groans of agony and casual vomiting's. "Nick?! what's wrong?!" Rochelle moved over to his side as Coach stood beside her. Nick could only groan and hiccup, tears starting to pour out of his eyes.

"He was mutterin' in his sleep," Ellis said, taking his hat off. "So I moved to wake him up, I think he was having a nightmare, and the stress is makin' him in more pain, I guess."  
  
"Good eye, Ellis." Coach said, maneuvering to the water bottles, wincing at the pained cries coming from Nick, who still seemed to be half asleep. "Can't give him anymore painkillers for now, though. We'll have to wait a couple of hours.

"Can he survive that long?" Rochelle asked, concern on her face.

"He'll be fine, we just need to calm him down."

"Nick," Rochelle shook him lightly, wiping the sweat from his forehead with a cloth. Nick didn't respond, but continued to writhe in pain as he clutched his side, rolling over away from them as tears continued to pour from his eyes.  
  
"S-stop..." Nick hiccuped, still stuck in his nightmare. He was back in the river, but instead of the tank, it was his friends pushing him down into the water. "I...I..."

"Nick, it's okay bud." Ellis rubbed the older mans shoulder. "Wake up." Nick shivered at the hand, the cold touch on his burning skin making him uncomfortable. In his dream, however, Ellis was pushing down on him instead of the soft touch in real life. "Sorr...y." As the tears continued, Coach went over to Nick and shook him lightly, but continuously, urging him to wake up. Nick woke up with a start, his face streaked with tears and his eyes darting around the room. His breathe fast and uneven, he bat away the hands around him. "I'm sorry, okay? Fuck off!" He sobbed, his voice full of venom but also sorrow. Everyone gathered around, pulling him into a hug. He repeated apologies, but they all shushed him as the hugged him and rubbed his back.

"It's fine, Nick, you're okay, honey."  
  
"You're good, bro!"  
  
"You're doing good, kid. That's right. Calm down."  
  
Nick felt himself come back to reality, calming down and unclutching his side, which was now bloodied as his refined nails had pierced it. Exhausted, but feeling much calmer, he clutched the bottom of Ellis and Coach's shirt, and leaned on Rochelle's shoulder.

"I.... I think I'm good." They didn't let go yet, and continued to rub his back as his breathing become even once again. They finally let go, after about a solid 10 minutes of calming him down, and he wiped his eyes with the cloth Rochelle gave him.  
  
"You can talk about it, ya know, if you want to." Ellis said, not at the best time, but at an Ellis time alright. Nick blew his nose and shook his head.

"I just, don't like, deep water." They all nodded. "Don't think I'm weak though."

"Of course not, we'd hate to get on your bad side." Coach said humoursly. "Would hate to hear you complain all the time about it."

"Even when injured and sick, we still clown on Nick!" Ellis laughed. "Hey, that rhymed!"

"Mmm...." Nick groaned lightly, but a soft smile on his face, one that they've never seen before. Maybe it was because he was not in his right mind and was injured and sick, but it was a pleasant sight nonetheless. After that, Nick had slept peacefully the next couple of days, his fever went down significantly, and he found himself being able to stand. His wounds were healing faster than they thought they would. He was allowed to put his suit back on, now cleaner than it was, once Coach was sure he wouldn't have to replace the bandages during their journey to the next safe house.

"I can replace them myself Coach, I'm fine now."

"I'll be the judge of that." Coach said, looking over Nick's body as the man put his suit back on. He still preferred some privacy, as Rochelle and Ellis looked away, but Coach's concern overpowered Nick's desire to be left to his own devices.

"Ok, I think you're good." Coach huffed, "but you're sticking with me the entire way, got it? No running off alone."  
  
"I will be perfectly fine on my own."  
  
"Not when I find you, you won't. I'm worse than any zombie."  
  
Ellis smiled cheerfully, laughing heartily. "You should have seen him when we went out yesterday to find you more pills. We saw some but a jockey was around them, but Coach ripped 'em a new one for sure!" Nick muttered an almost inaudible thank you, but his appreciation for Coach's dedication to helping him get better was obvious, and Coach smiled. "No problem, Nick. Let's get a move on people, the next safehouse is a bit far."

"Don't know if I'll make it Coach! Maybe we can vegetate here for a while!" Nick joked, but Coach didn't take his as entirely a joke and gave Nick a glance. "Should I carry you there then? Because even for the sake of a joke, Nick, you're still injured."  
  
"I told ya, I'll be fine, sheesh, take a joke."  
  
"Hard to take a joke when you were crying all-"  
  
"OKAY I GET IT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONCERN COACH." Coach snickered as Nick went red in the face again, and Ellis whispered in Nick's ear as they trudged through the town once more. "Glad you're good now Nick, had us all worried there." Nick gave a smirk in return. "You're lucky it was me instead of you, I doubt you'd have survived the trials and tribulations I was put through! I'm tougher than you think."

"Of course you are, sport!" He ruffled the older mans hair, and Nick hissed at him. "Quit it, asshole!" The jeered back and forth like normal, Ellis laughing as Nick angrily chased him to the best of his ability. Annoying as it was, it was better than the past few days had been. And Nick would only trade for a peaceful world with no zombies, provided his friends were still there.

And no deep water. Scary shit man. But now, it didn't seem so scary anymore, his friends were with him, and that's all the mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> yes my grammar died halfway through and yes i rushed the ending and yes i am tired and yes i wrote this from 12 am to 6 am. yes i have a paper due today and yes i haven't started on it. what of it huh?! huh?!?!?! thanks for reading lol!! Please Comment, it's very much appreciated <3


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